These are the 26 newest scriptures as written by PoisonedGrace

«| antecedent 26 from the archives |»

«|» Wednesday, December 16th, 2009 «|»
12:07 pm «|»	My Weekend Adventures In The Movies. Well, I find myself at loose ends today. I'm on my lunch break, and I have nothing to do. I finished reading what I've been reading this week, and I'm not feeling a pressing need to start anything else immediately. If I don't do something I'm going to get sleepy, so I'll post about my weekend, even though I am not feeling particularly inclined to. That's weird in and of itself. It always sort of seems as though I never get really into posting about "real life" stuff that I'm doing, even when it's exciting. Just more about what's going on in my head. I should probably try to make a better effort with that or something. :/ You may remember this post last week: http://poisonedgrace.livejournal.com/552439.html But then again, you may not because it was TL;DR I had said in there that I was hoping to get involved with the project again on Friday (which would have been this past Friday, the 11th). Well, I did. I went home from work, & got all the people willing to get off their butts & go DO something rounded up. Final count was Me, Cam, Eric, emotion_monger , & ameliamunster . I got on my Redneck Disguise (which was previously detailed in the TL;DR post linked above) except this time I had a knitted hat. We headed out to the dead middle of nowhere (I got lost on the way) to an empty fairgrounds place. I guess we got there around 6pm-ish. There was the usual waiting around & stuff. We ended up being extras in a series of fight scenes. Cam was also an extra in the crowd during a wet t-shirt contest. Got to see boobies and everything. Go Cam! I should be fairly clearly on camera a number of times. Also got to play stand-in (inside the octagon ring none the less) for Eric Balfour, which was pretty cool. Also got to be in a scene with Michael Bisping, who is actually a nice guy, even though I heard otherwise from some people who actually watch reality TV. I don't watch any of it, so I don't know what prompted that response, but I can tell you first hand he's a nice guy with a good sense of humour, and somewhat excitable, in a good way. I got to meet Heath Herring as well, who is absolutely one of the nicest, friendliest guys you could ever hope to meet. I think I ended up getting home around 7am (Saturday morn), which made it a 27 hour day for me, since I'm up for my normal job at 6am on Fridays. I think a good time was had by all, even though it was right around freezing, and rainy and wet all night. I was frozen solid by the end of the night, but I felt alright since those poor wet t-shirt girls had to do about 10 takes in the same weather! I slept for a while, but not as long as I'd like. Then I got up and provided my room mate with a ride to work and prepared to take care of some things I needed to do until later that night when I had told her I'd give her a ride home. I was also looking forward to a nice leisurely Saturday after such an eventful Friday. And of course, I get a message that they would like me to come down to the set, even though they don't need me for an extra that day, but instead to be a PA. I made arrangements to get free of the things I needed to do, and got dressed up nice and warm (having learned my lesson the previous over-night shoot). I got down to the set, which was at an old abandoned power plant this time. They needed a few extras who would be good for playing "thugs". I left a message for doombuggie , because even though we had never met IRL, I figured that ANYONE who was 7 feet tall would make a great addition to a lineup of "thugs" or what-have-you. And we got to hang out and chat a bit during down time, so that was cool too. I did all sorts of things. From carrying cinder blocks and moving set pieces around, to assisting the Assistant Director by echoing and stuff. I got to be a stand-in for Bisping, who also took a cell phone video of me snarling and clawing at the air (because he liked my scarf, apparently lol). I was there from around 6pm to around 6am. The power plant was awesome, and I explored part of it off the set when no-one was looking. The scariest bathroom I've been in in a whole lot of years was there. I loved it. Also got to see Klifften, Andrew & Victoria a bit (they were all part of the zombie movie that Andrew directed a while back that I posted about when we won the award for it). That was a super awesome bonus. There were all sorts of adventures and excitement as well as a lot of waiting and exhaustion. By the time I got home my feet were killing me, and I loved every minute of it. Hopefully I'll get to work with them again on this coming Friday, which will wrap the shoot (here in Austin at least). So there's the end of the promised entry and I'll keep you all updated on when the movie is coming out, and you can carry yourselves out to see it! <3 « 5 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
9:19 am «|»	More of an Explanation that you usually get. In a weird sort of mood this morning. Undefinable. But I have a weird stabbing pain in my head, and maybe it's making me crazy enough to do this: So I'm offering you Maps & Legends Hey, I'll even answer questions. Maybe there's something to be said for it. A Quick guide (if I forgot anything, ask & I'll add it) Text appearing in (this shade of) Blue typically denotes a dream. Or a Dream (yes there's a difference. If you don't know the difference, that's something I can answer I suppose, but I don't want to bore both of you all if it's old obvious news.). Text in this shade of Grey is typically used for quotation. Often times it'll be lyrics or literature. Things Written By Others. These things are always also in Italics, thus the look of this line. Sometimes text is colour coded towards a specific audience. This Purple used to be you & I think you were once this one. Once this nauseating shade of Pink was you (maybe because I really don't like that colour at ALL.) You were once Red, but now you're Dead & Red can be any number of things but we'll talk about that later. I think another shade of pink stood for you a few times. You once had a light blue. I have been coloured green (Green is the colour of my God) more often than not, as it's the default colour of most of my web sites. But none of these are set in stone, as they're usually more about a reflection of a certain nuance of interaction or or just to make something stand out. The whole world is RAINBOWs, so these change often and randomly. Bold, Underline, Strike Through, and Italics can be just for tonal emphasis, although "Italics with quotes" or colour is always a quotation. The hidden text: FYI, yes it always spells out something. Yes, it always means something. The colours are generally selected simply for aesthetics, but rarely they may refelct mood or target. Sometimes if it's more than one separate message sharing space, then different colours may just denote different message strings, and I might just start to run out of easy to detect colours. I tend to like to use red because it's a good contrasting colour. I also like that Halloween Orange colour. Those are definitely easy to see. Sometimes things are hidden in font size or shape as well. Sometimes things are hidden black on black or white on white fonts, so that you can only find it by highlighting the correct area. Those ones are hidden from you the best, but also the most rare and very few people have ever found them. But sometimes that's what it's about. I am sure that there are a million other confusions, questions, & points of clarification that I could address, but I don't have any more coming to mind right off my head, because... well this IS all my head, so I can't really know what you know & what you don't... So, ask away. If I stay in this mood, I'll be willing to answer 99% of your questions as straight forwardly as possible, but I reserve the right to not answer some things anyhow LOL ;) « 6 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Tuesday, December 15th, 2009 «|»
10:01 am «|»	a chicken to ride... Had dreams last night about traveling. The first one had Me But Not Me at an airport. This wasn't a normal airport though. It was all outside, and they had a lot of people going up some stairs, like you see for planes with outdoor loading (you know like for the president or whatever). I (but not I) was with some friends (whom Waking Me does not know). We went up the stairs, and joined the other passengers on the back of a gigantic chicken. This chicken was like the size of a building. A big building. There were probably 50 to 100 people on its back. I was all kinds of excited, because... Hey! Flying on a giant chicken?! How cool is that? So we waited and waited and not much happened, just like a real world airport. Then, finally, they wheeled out another set of even more gigantic stairs, and the chicken started walking up them with all of us on his back. The chicken goes into a GIANT airplane. I was sort of mystified and disappointed all at once. When he went through the door, all the passengers were suddenly inside an airplane which seemed like it was the size of an entire town, and the chicken was normal sized. We started walking through the plane looking for our seats and couldn't find them. We asked someone, and they lead us through a labyrinth of doors and corridors until we ended up out on the wing. Only this part of the wing had a strange sort of covering on it. It had no seats, but there were some sort of crappy handles for us to cling to. This was where we'd be riding. There was a sort of room right near us, with a bunch of marines in it. They were all strapped in like some sort of drop team. All kinds of gear and big guns and shit, and roller-coaster style harnesses to keep them safe. Made our shitty handles seem kinda... Shitty. I woke up right as we were taking off, so I don't know if we made it alright or not. Later at some point, I dreamed that I was in a seaside sort of town that I've never been to before. I think I was actually me this time. I don't remember a lot about this one. I had a really good outfit, and I remember a sort of old wooden building like a multi-level pub or something, and it had a dock sort of area in the back. I remember boarding a ship and setting sail. I remember that all around the town there were these giant sort of marine mammals, sort of like elephant seals or walruses or something, they were very large. I remember seeing them from the street and from the boat. I think the city was elevated a ways above the water on poles or something. I mainly remember the animals and setting sail on the ship. So I guess the theme of the night was Giant Animals & Travel. Weird. ___ One of these days I'll get enough of a break from the dream (and the Dream) blogs so that I can tell you about my recent adventures on Friday and Saturday. Those are kinda long though, and for later. So instead, I will tell you that I went shopping last night with Joanne & Allen and helped pick some x-mas shit for people, and finished up my last few x-mas things I needed to buy too. I *might* need to get one thing for a birthday, but that would be it for this month. We went up to the mall, and I totally got excited because guess what was there?! GYPSIES! For really real real life Gypsies! For those of you who might not know, I LOVE Gypsies. I have wanted to run away and join them since I was old enough to walk. The threat of being 'taken away' or 'stolen' by them was never a threat, it was a wonderful promise. I think they tend to be fairly closed off to outsiders though, so I'm not sure I could weasel my way in. And I haven't yet found an awesome Gypsy girl to latch on to and make mine <3 (if you know of one, point her my way!). Anyhow, they've set up a fly-by-night stand (and store) in there. The stand is selling little magic tricks (card tricks, simple illusions etc) for about 4 times the going price, but they have a suave young guy out there impressing people with his sleight of hand. I wouldn;y have bought anything from them if it was regular folk... but... C'mon man! GYPSIES!!! The store has a bunch of radio control stuff and random games and things. I'm sure they'll flee town right after x-mas and head off to the next place to set up a nice grift. There's not much that could have made me happier than random Gypsies. The perseverance they have as a people is inspiring, considering that they've been the single most oppressed and ill treated race of people on the earth, since day one, & still are. And if you plan on badmouthing them, you'd better just peddle them peas somewhere else, buddy. Because they've done what they had to to survive and make it, and by god so would you if you were in the same situation. Lord knows that I sure as hell have, and once you've had to steal to eat & steal to feed your family, you sure as hell come to appreciate people who have had to do it for centuries. That's it for now. Hopefully I'll have time & inclination to tell you about my Friday and Saturday sometime soon. <3 « 2 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Monday, December 14th, 2009 «|»
9:25 am «|»	Radiating Eyes Godspeed you, Monster Girl. I hope you start fires they can see from space. I'm sorry that I wasn't there all those years ago when you needed someone most. I hope that the small amount I could do may have helped in some way, or that my words might have lent you strength. I thank you for your gesture with the tires... And now as I type this... Not only do I realize part of what you meant, but also Who You Are. You almost tricked me that time. It was a good Aspect. I didn't recognize You at first, and only through my typing it out and examination, do I see You clearly. But You know my nature better than I and You planned that, didn't You? I will try to keep that lesson in mind and see how it works out for me. Maybe You learned something too? Even You... not an island (or was that all just for show?). So where is the medium there? Ah! Clever Creature, You! Answering my (again, obvious to my nature) response with a wink and a nod. But am I alone in that? What would it be like if that fire truly consumed... Is it consuming or is that a metaphor too? Is it destruction or glory? Is it not even the fire, but the point of the fire? Is it the fact that You set the fire? Is it a threat or a promise? Are You telling me to "Burn it all!" or are you saying "He who endureth to the end shall be saved."? All futile or all worthy? And using the narrow confined spaces to illustrate the subtext worked out well too. Now I see the Dream last week for what it was more clearly. Thank You for that. What was in the box and why couldn't I get it open? I feel like I could, but the timing was never right. I was going to open it for You. We were going to go in together. Why was I waiting until everyone else had passed by and they weren't looking? This is all self evident though, isn't it? What's the lesson? Am I actually not letting people in? Am I walled up? Is it futile to wait for the right time? Do I let circumstance thwart progress? Ugh, You vex me so! 3 answers and 1001 questions. But You know that I'm smiling as I type this, and I love every bit of it. « 1 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Friday, December 11th, 2009 «|»
10:10 am «|»	Today is Yesterdays Tomorrow I got my x-mas gift from my mom & step-dad early this year. It had to be delivered, so they came over and brought about 100 pounds of Chinese food and we made an event of it. The plan was to wait on the delivery together, but the delivery guys were early and got there first. So now, I have a nice new mattress, which is pretty awesome, considering that my old one was about like 13 years old, and had sharp springs poking out of it which would cut you if you lay wrong. Kinda like being in prison I guess. It was so old that it was limp and wiggly if you tried to move it. Even just laying by itself it was sort of collapsed inward like a taco shell. Anyhow, the new one is really nice. it's all kinds of thick and poofy. :D ___ I had three dreams last night. One was bad. The bad one made me forget both of the other ones. I dreamed that you became a horror. A terrible thing, just like so many of the others. Unreasonable as anything, which is something I'm all too familiar with. I think if that happened with you of all people, I truly would lose whatever faith I have remaining. ___ So, yesterday, I said I had realized "a couple" of things, but due to the TL;DR I was just going to give you one then, and one tomorrow. Well, it's tomorrow now. I had been talking about 'love' and relationships and whatever. You can go look at the TL;DR from yesterday if you forgot already... The second thing that I realized... and this one has been floating around in my head for a while now, but I think that it was solidified more recently, and maybe given voice during the afore mentioned discussion. I don't think I've ever really been in a relationship where anyone was ever like... proud to be with me. I'll try to explain this better, I'm having another day where the words don't dance right. Sometimes I'll see someone's status somewhere... myspace, facebook, or whatever. Or I'll see a blog, or just a blurb on a profile or something. They'll say something about having such a great BF or something about being taken, or totally smitten or WTF ever cornball thing they say. Usually it's totally cheesy and stupid, but it's also.... kinda nice. It seems like they're really proud of who they're with, you know? Like it really means something to them. And sure it might be completely ignorant, and they might be broken up and never speaking again in a week to six months or whatever, but still. I just don't think anyone has ever felt like that about me. Maybe for a week, or a month or something, or maybe they totally internalized it and kept it secret and all closed off to themselves, which doesn't do much for good communication. I can't even remember anyone ever proudly claiming me in public. Now I'm talking about relationships here, I'm not saying I'm an orphan. I'm speaking romantically, so if you're going to tell me that my family claims me, please keep your incest to yourself, kthx. For those of you keeping count, I've had three girlfriends none of which were short relationships. With one, everything was a struggle it seems. With another, I was actively a huge dirty secret, my existence (or at least the existence of our relationship) to be kept hidden from the world at all possible costs. The last wore apathy's crown so tightly that to this day I sometimes wonder how much of it was all in my head. Now some (or a lot) of this could be due to lack of communication, or a lack of knowing how to communicate. WTF at that anyhow? Aren't girls supposed to be the ones "in touch with their feelings"? Don't most meat-head dudes always QQ about girls going on about their feelings and shit? With all my exes, and a hell of a lot of the other women I've known, it's like pulling teeth from a live grizzly bear just to try and get any idea what in the hell they're feeling, and you're likely to come back wounded and battered with nothing to show for it. With any sort of serious inquiry, one has to first address commonality. I don't really have a 'type' when it comes to women. Closest I come to having a 'type' would be the immortal words of Lloyd Kaufman, who said something to the effect of "women with HUGE brains and tiny clothing." But that's more of a humour concept anyhow (always makes me laugh at least). So, since they didn't really have much in common, then let's examine the one thing that they DID have in common... Me. The whole thing... my entire life experience sort of leads me to question if maybe there's just something about me. Maybe I'm embarrassing. Maybe I'm a disappointment. Maybe there's not anyone out there who is ever going to really be that into me. maybe there's no one who is going to be proud to be with me. Maybe no one will ever do more than merely tolerate me. Should I just pack it up and settle for that? I don't want to. I don't think I even can. So what does that leave me? I don't even know anymore. I just know that I'm sick of it. I'm sick of people who refuse to communicate with me. I'm sick of really and truly giving my all just to be met with "meh" and a halfhearted shrug. I'm sick of being the 'trainer boyfriend' and wasting my time just so that people can leave and go apply everything they learned off me to have a happy and amazing life. Some of you who have been with me for the long haul of this blog (7 years now, kids!) know damned good and well that I have, over the years, put a lot of thought and effort into my past relationships. Aren't those things supposed to be situations where people like... "meet 1/2 way"? I'm sure I've been met 1/2 way in some areas, at some times, but as far as the over all picture goes, I'm not doing so well. Some complete ass is probably going to storm in here and accuse me of whining or something, but that's truly not my intent, I'm more like... observing. Any relationship I've ever had is old news, and it seems most of the time like the other parties involved would just as well like to forget that any of it ever happened, which is bizarre, since they've also all said how great I always was. Shit fucking hell, I probably shouldn't even post this, because someone is bound to go and make me mad before it's all over. Or say something unreasonably stupid at the least. I guess the moral of the story is that it seems like it'd be really swell to be in a relationship with someone who actually likes me! Novel concept, that. Wonder if I'll ever get a chance to try that out. I wonder if I even care anymore? I think it's good for me to actually explore these concepts 'out loud' for a change, rather than just dwelling on them. Because the more I type about this, it's almost like the less I care. Maybe relationships and girlfriends are like Fathers and are a completely useless thing that no one on earth should be burdened with. Honestly at this point, I'm not even sure who is driving anymore. There are several of us in here but there has been some changes going on for a while now, and I'm no longer entirely clear on who is who. Right now, someone is trying to fall asleep, someone is wanting to burn the world, someone else is making a mindless repetitive noise, and someone else (the current notion of "I") is trying to keep order. This is all to say, that due to ...everything... I am of a conflicted mind, to be sure. And perhaps much more than that. "J'ai tant fait patience Qu'a jamais j'oublie ; Craintes et souffrances Aux cieux sont parties. Et la soif malsaine Obscurcit mes veines" This entire thing is derailing faster than I can process, so I'm just going to be bold and click 'post' before I have a chance to run away. « 4 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Thursday, December 10th, 2009 «|»
11:17 pm «|»	Writer's Block: The One Movie Everyone Should See What one film do you think everyone should see? Sponsored by The Official AVATAR Community on TypePad. See AVATAR in theaters December 18, 2009. View 522 Answers One...? That's hardly fair. It depends on too many things. There's a film for every mood. A better question would be ... "A Film..." That one, I could answer :) « 2 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
12:57 pm «|»	Fuck yeah! I dunno if I've ever mentioned this before, but this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcjPFAV1foU Is the greatest music video of all time. « 7 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
9:25 am «|»	Rusted I fell asleep last night, then spent the rest of the night in that giant weird store that I end up in sometimes. I somehow found myself to be inside a large box with you at one point or another. Very strange. ___ I've been thinking (man, I find myself saying that a lot) about a conversation that I had with a friend about the nature of love and the different kinds thereof etc etc. And by that, I mean everything from friendship to family to romantic and any variation you can make out of any of that. And it's got me to thinking (maybe too much) about the past, the present & the future. About friends, family, loves, giving & expectations. Too much for my small feeble brain to correctly process. But I've realized a couple of things... One is that I have some 'Fair Weather' people in my life. Only that's not really right, because they're more like 'Foul Weather' friends. What I mean by that, is that I only hear from them when they're upset, and it's usually all about that. Then poof, they're gone in a cloud of WTF as soon as the storm has passed. I try to be the sort of person who is patient, attentive and understanding. If I know someone who wants to talk about something that's going on in their life, or something that's bothering them, I listen. I'll share my opinion as requested or needed, but I can also keep it to myself if they just need to vent. If I know someone is going through a hard time, I will usually ask if they're OK, or if they need to talk, etc. I always ask people how they're doing, what's going on in their lives. I'm sure that many of you who talk to me outside of this blog know that. I've realized that I have some people who don't really ever ask ME how I am doing. People whom I talk to on a really regular basis who don't really have any idea what's going on in my life. No idea what I'm working on, what I'm spending my time on, or how I am mentally, physically or emotionally. They're always quick to tell me all about their lives and situations, but I might as well be a psychologist or some other professional, for all they bother to know about my life. That's sort of a disappointing feeling. I mean on one hand, I don't care about people in terms of what I'm going to get out of it. I don't listen to and help people based on the idea of some return or payoff. But also... At what point does it become ... I don't even know a word... At what point does it become a farce, a rip-off, a sham, being taken advantage of, one sided... whatever. Some of those are maybe harsh terms, but I can't really find the right word, so I'm giving you a general idea, and I'm sure you get it. I'm not even looking for someone to empty my head or my heart to, I know that there simply is no one to fill that role. Some people are willing to hear some things, other people are willing to listen to others, but there is no completion. That's why I created this blog, honestly. It's an imaginary friend whom I can say anything to. You all just happen to tune in and overhear my whisperings sometimes. It's sad, but completely honest. I also have some people who only interact with me when they're "bored". By bored, I don't mean "I have 30 minutes to kill before I'm ready to go to bed. Let's see who is on AIM." By bored, I mean more like "I'm between boyfriends/girlfriends and can't stand my own headspace so I need someone to entertain me. DANCE, MONKEY!" Then next month when they're fussing over the newest member of the Man Parade that is their life, I see hide nor hair of them until it cycles around again. I hate to sound demanding or self important or anything... But enigmatic, mysterious, magical and strange as I may be... I am still a living creature. I'm here when you go away. I have things going on in MY life too. I have projects that I work on. I have little successes and failures. Triumphs and frustrations, thoughts and feelings, hopes and dreams, pains and nightmares. I don't understand why being virtuous, giving and understanding mandates propensity towards door-mat-ism (again, not the right word, and also, not even a real word, but you get the general idea). I'm not really even complaining about this, just noticing and making a note of it, because that's what I do here. This information will be assembled as part of the over all Understanding Project. That's the first thing I realized. I'll give you the second later (or maybe tomorrow) because any time I post something more than 200 words, only like 1 to maybe 3 people even read it anyhow, and I'm sure this one is already so TL;DR that it'll rot away at the cricket convention sweetly unnoticed until the internet ceases to be. ___ Also: http://www.news24.com/Content/World/News/1073/f9288c35d4214826a97986dd2d02a10e/09-12-2009-02-07/Students_jaw_blown_off_by_gum « 21 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Wednesday, December 9th, 2009 «|»
2:29 pm «|»	crust It's funny because it just keeps going on and on in a seemingly endless cycle, and you simply are not smart enough, self aware enough or enlightened enough to even GET that. But then again, much as they say "ignorance is bliss", so is stupidity, because for all of the polarity switches, you manage some wild happy. I'm not sure that I could even stand to ride on that roller-coaster on such a regular basis as you do. It makes my head spin and I'm as far removed from it all as a boy can be. ___ I'll keep myself to me. Ugly as sin, empty as a void, unchanging & unrepentant. ___ I know I had dreams last night. I woke with faint impressions of them, but I can't remember anymore. I couldn't remember within five minutes. Like a lingering scent on the skin, and you can't remember who left it there. I wonder if my waking life seems like that when I'm dreaming? ___ Having a hard time staying focused today. On much of anything. Thus there's this sadly lacking blog that sounds kinda negative, but it's totally not at all, but most people never understand the difference between negativity and DEFIANCE, because so few people are actually defiant since it's so much easier to go along with the flow and ignore the things around you. To me, being passive and ignoring things is negative, so I don't know how all that lines up, but it doesn't matter if it does or not because run-on-sentences are your friends. ___ I swear the guy who just walked behind me was making a sort of weird motor boat kinda noise. What's that all about?! «|» mood: Tumbleweed «|» « Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Tuesday, December 8th, 2009 «|»
11:54 am «|»	Yesterday... Sorry for the lack of a post yesterday. I spent most of the day freezing on a ranch & in a barn. Hahaha! My life is awesome! It was a movie shoot for the new movie staring Rudy Youngblood (if you don't know the name, you'd recognize him as the main character [Jaguar Paw] in Apacalypto. I was going to get to play a redneck in a barn. It was shaping up to be a pretty awesome fight scene, and it was awesome and exciting.... Then, the camera broke (or malfunctioned, or got an attitude, or whatever happens to cameras that cost three times more than my car [probably a conservative estimate at that]). That threw everything off for finishing that scene, so long story short, a lot of people got sent home, and unfortunately, I was one of them. I was welcome to come back today (and all week) but alas, I used up all my vacation time around Thanksgiving when I took those days off for things that didn't happen exactly like they were supposed to. I could only really get away with (and afford) calling into work one day, so that's that. For now at least... It's looking like I should be able to make it back on set this Friday, after work. Maybe I'll get lucky and manage to get into a smaller scene (the one Monday was perfect, I totally would have been right on camera!), but it's sounding like Friday might end up being a Large Crowd scene type thing, which isn't *quite* as cool, but that'll do, pig. That'll do. I was dressed "Ranch Hand" for the part. Which involved me wearing bluejeans for the first time since..... Highschool? College? IDK, but it's been a while for sure. I found back when I moved that I had an old pair in a bag with costumes and stuff. They still fit, so I wore those. I borrowed a denim jacket from my step dad. I had a pair of brown GBX shows / hiking boot kinda things? Got them years ago at Ross for like 10.00 for a job interview. They're sort of 'informal office dressy'. I had a red shirt that I wear as one of my work disguises. Hair in a bandanna. Quite the departure for me. My friend Andrew said "I almost didn't recognize you in that. That's more of a disguise for you than your giant monster costume. Where did you even GET those clothes?" And that's all funny because it's true. Oh! And I also didn't shave for like 3 or more days, so I had a sort of a shitty beard sort of thing going. Lest I be too terribly manly though, what no-one realized was that under my jeans I was wearing a pair of purple striped tights <3 Danny Trejo is supposed to be in the movie at some point as well, but he was not in the scenes I was there for Monday, and I didn't see him around the lot *sadface* Monday was a lot of fun and educational, kind of a bummer that my scene went awry though. Hopefully Friday will be amazingly awesome. ___ Between moving, the Car Crash-a-thon & the Holidays, my money situation is absolutely TERRIBLE. I'm really hoping that I can get caught back up a bit soon. I'm talking about 'can't feed myself bad'. Ugh! ___ The more I think about you... the more disgusted I feel. Congrats on that, really. ___ You, on the other hand, are pretty damned awesome, but why does life have to be so complicated? ___ Feeling a thousand things at once is pretty tiring. I need an off switch sometimes. Not going to happen, and not really anyone in my life to talk to about much of it, so I will simply remain... « Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Saturday, December 5th, 2009 «|»
12:02 pm «|»	success of sort? I dreamed that you lived with a nomadic tribe on the edge of a desert. I lived in a castle on the other side. We would meet in the dunes to read books and have adventures. The dream was long and beautiful and filled with detail. So real I can remember every strand of your hair blowing in the wind. I can still feel every grain of sand on my skin and between my fingers. I can remember the smell of the dry desert plants. I can still feel you in my arms, with my hands on your back, holding you close. This is one of those times where waking up is a bit disappointing. « Fall From Grace » «|»
2:31 am «|»	Another Saturday One of those nights where I am bored & lonely. Not even remotely tired. Will probably end up watching bad movies until I fall asleep where I can dream that I am less antisocial and that you actually exist somewhere out there under the same sky as me. I wonder if you ever will. Or if you already do, and you just don't care. Instead I'll curl up with your aged nothing. Make my nest out of broken heart fragments. Cover myself with pretend memories of an impossible future. My arms ache for you... « Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Friday, December 4th, 2009 «|»
1:32 pm «|»	sluagh gairm My Dearest Fat Lump Turds, Thank you for all the sugar in the gas tank. We appreciate your attention to detail here at Advanced Core Systems Industries. We are currently having our Buy 1 Get 1 Free Extravaganza. Come Early, Save More. We try harder, so that you don't have to. No substitutions, priced as marked, close cover before striking. A little dab'll do ya. And all because the lady loves Milk Tray. Harmful if swallowed. The antidote for civilization. Never iron clothes while they are being worn. A diamond is forever. Put a tiger in your tank. Never use hair dryer while sleeping. When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight. Hand-built by robots. May irritate eyes. When you care enough to send the very best. Snap! Crackle! Pop! Do not consume. Finger lickin' good. May cause drowsiness. Because I'm worth it. Improper use could result in serious injury or death. The milk chocolate melts in your mouth, not in your hand. Do not operate heavy machinery. Good to the last drop. Do not touch it by hand, mixed the mess. Got Milk? After heating, product may become hot. When it rains, it pours! Just do it. Contents under pressure. Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't. If you do not understand, or cannot read all directions, cautions and warnings do not use this product. All the news that's fit to print. It takes a licking and keeps on ticking. Refrigerate after opening. It's everywhere you want to be. Breakfast of champions. Do not feed the animals. Let your fingers do the walking. Please dispose of properly. Seventeen, thirty-five, six, three hundred and one. Your flexible friend, Phineas T. W. Abernathy « 2 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Thursday, December 3rd, 2009 «|»
12:35 pm «|»	Ready for your closeup? We will be filming a party scene for our upcoming movie. We would love to have you (yes, YOU!) as an actor person in our production! It's just a party scene, so you won't be getting anything gross or sticky on you or anything (although, if you're into that kind of thing, see me afterward and we'll talk). Come have fun! If you like it, maybe we can get you into another scene (or even another film) later. Either way, it'll be a good time, and you'll meet some cool people! If you've already signed up to attend (from the mailing list, from an evite, or having seen this somewhere else), thank you SO very much! We greatly appreciate you being involved. No need to re-RSVP. Depending on where you live, and what your schedule / situation is like for that day, I *may* be able to assist with transportation or carpool for a limited amount of people. Date / Location: Saturday December 19th, 2009, 8:30pm 1906 Overcup Dr. Round Rock, TX 78681 You can dress as formal or informal as you desire, just remember the following things: 1. We will be filming at this party for our upcoming movie, if you don't want to be seen in the back ground, you may not want to come. 2. Bring your friends and drinks (BYOB) but we'll have some soda and stuff of course. 3. Please wear clothing with no copywrite (like no giant Nike, Abercrombie logos, band names, etc) 4. A live band, Maryann and The Shaky Hands will be playing early in the night. Show up around 8:30 or 9 to see the show! 5. Be an extra in our movie while hanging out with friends and having fun! 6. Even if it's not cold on this night, please bring your jacket or coat as though it were! The setting of the movie requires this. 7. Please RSVP to this event, THIS IS IMPORTANT! we will need a fairly accurate headcount so that we can plan accordingly. 8. Have more questions? Please ask here, or email homespunhorror@yahoo.com « Fall From Grace » «|»
11:49 am «|»	Movie Time I have an even better treat you you today, my lumplings! Today, you can go see our award winning zombie movie online for free! It should be safe for work, depending on where you work. There is no nudity. There is some swearing, and some blood / gore, but why don't you have headphones at work anyhow?! Please re-post the movie or a link to the movie if you like it. Any small thing to help support independent film is an amazing help. Possibly more so than you imagine. Most of these things are labors of love, and just hearing feedback and getting comments online is even a great thing to the people involved. It also helps out with future projects. Speaking of future projects, would you like to be involved in one? I will be posting info on that just a little later on! Stay tuned, dearly beloved! <3 « 10 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009 «|»
12:01 pm «|»	Sticks and... no.. wait... just sticks... It's really cold in here today. I wonder if that's going to be standard for the new place they have me sitting. ___ Went to Lowes last night to get the final bits for The Cave (2.0). Since last time I went in and bought a long wooden pole, they've moved them. Now granted it's been a good few years. Last time I bought one was back when I realized how much cheaper it was than a 'real' staff for my martial arts classes. And srsly, a long wooden stick is a long wooden stick for all practical purposes. Anyhow, I went in and they were not where they used to be. No problem, I needed to buy a couple of dowels anyhow, so I went to where they should have been. I bought a dowel right before Halloween, at the Lowes right by my mom's house. Went to the same area in the one by my house, and there was nothing of the sort. Got to wander around looking for it, and quickly saw that the stores do not have even a remotely similar organization scheme. Things were seemingly placed at random. I remembered buying a dowel there at that location before, so I went where they had been then. Nope, they were moved as well. Wandered around looking for someone to ask, but like many large chain stores, the employees practice Retail Ninjutsu. You know this art? The one where they endlessly hound you as though you're robbing the place when you do not need assistance, but once you do, they vanish in a puff of smoke and you can't find them even if you're screaming at the top of your lungs? These were skilled retail ninjas! I finally found the dowels, and got what I needed, but the large wooden poles were not located near the dowels (which is kinda silly because dowels are really just short wooden poles :/ ) I FINALLY found a guy to ask. He had several rather interesting notions on where they were located and led me on a jaunty path around the entire store several times, and remained, even after asking "the guy in plumbing" where they were, still failed. He wandered off to find someone else to ask. I was just about to ask some other guy, when guy 1 comes back all triumphant like and says he found them. So he leads me ceremoniously to a section containing long... METAL poles. I thanked him and waited for him to leave because clearly he was worse than no help at all. I was totally wondering how bloody cunting hard it was to locate a WOODEN STICK in a store such as Lowes when I decided to just give up and go see the curtain rods. Unfortunately they're usually like... collapsible and stuff to fit various sized windows / doors, and I was hoping for something a bit more sturdy. But having been shown shower curtains a-plenty and some really terrible metal closet stuff, I figured anything was worth a shot, right? Of course, the new isle where they decided to locate the long wooden poles was right by the mini blinds, which makes... total... sense? The mini blinds happen to be down the isle with the curtains and curtain rods. So that worked out in a weird sort of way I guess. Armed with my amazing new epic wooden stick: I went home. I had borrowed a drill from my step-dad to finish up some hanging of things that needed to happen, and to put the final addition of the epically hidden wooden pole into place, and of course the battery died after 3 seconds of use, so that wasn't accomplished either. I'll have to go up there soon and trade out batteries. ___ I guess I burned myself out on the tale of Lowes, and on going to all the trouble to craft you a custom made graphic, because I find myself ready to be done with the blog now. Good day, sir. «|» mood: AMUSED «|» « 2 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Tuesday, December 1st, 2009 «|»
9:19 am «|»	"The world is a...." Wait? What? That doesn't even make any sense! I hate vampires. I mean seriously. Any of you wieners ever READ 'Dracula'? If you have not, you can, for 100% free. Here ya go: http://www.literature.org/authors/stoker-bram/dracula/ (yes, I do realize that Stoker did not invent vampires, but you'd be a fool to argue the influence of this book / character on the legend.) Originally, Dracula was not depicted as remotely 'sexy' he was a giant hideous parasite. The only real sexual context you could put him into would be the role of a rapist imo. Countless times he was compared to a leech or a tick. Do any of you people get all hot & bothered for ticks and leeches (or god forbid, rapists)? I hate what the legend has become. The romanticization (a real word which breaks the spell-checker FTW) of vampires started a long damn time ago, and it's just gone on unchecked for far too long. Anne Rice (gag) whipped it up into an over the top frenzy and also shit-bag "role playing" games like White Wolf publishes with all their 'World of Darkness' vampire / werewolf swill certainly has not helped any. It's sad when a truly horrifying creature of legend has been tamed and domesticated to the point that they're fucking cute and cuddly. This was a creature who is supposed to have you checking your locks at night and saying your prayers before bed, not someone who you really hope to meet this weekend as the mall. This isn't pointed at anyone, or even any specific modern bit of pop entertainment, it's just something I've been thinking about since I was about 7 years old, and everyone who has ever spoken to me about the topic already knows. So annoying. All of the 'cool' has been robbed from vampires for the last 20 or 30 years. They've been neutered. It's a pretty fuckin sad era when Count Chocula is one of the baddest motherfuckers on the block, amIrite? I've always loved the vampire hunters much, much more. And as much as I <3 Joss, I'm sure as heck not talking about Buffy here. Rather, Captain Kronos, Professor Van Helsing & his crew, fuckin Simon Belmont for the love of god! Who the hell is cooler than Simon Belmont?! There's something much more stirring about facing an absolute eternal evil which can outsmart, overpower and out-maneuver you at every turn, but bravely and boldly carrying on out of a sense of duty and rightness. That is so much more awesome than shacking up to rub sweaty bits with a giant leech. The ONLY question I personally have on the topic of the vampire is: Team Van Helsing or Team Belmont? ___ Speaking of 'vampires'... Wow, you're really tiring to be around. Just suck all the energy, drive and life-force right out of someone. I wonder if you feed on it and grow stronger. I wonder how it works. Like is it a natural thing? Just a part of the creature who you are? Or is it something that could be learned and used for other purposes? If you do consume it and it makes you stronger, I wonder if I could learn to do it. Maybe I could go to the bank or a parade or some crowded place, and just siphon the life force and Will to Live off of everyone in a 10 yard radius and then have the energy of a superman for a solid week? Mystifying, really. Not the only case of it that I've seen, by far. There are different variations and nuance here and there. Warped realities abound. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for living in your own world, your own way, and making your environment into what you want it to be, but there are different ways to do it. I just typed up a couple of long winded and specific examples, but decided to simplify it a lot. There's a way to do it that makes you at odds with anyone around you. Revisionist history, assigning unwilling people roles and laying blame around to make yourself feel better about your own self trickery. Or, you can just believe how you believe and not care to involve unwilling participants. Go merrily about your life, letting in (or not, I suppose if that floats your soap) other people who understand. I'll let you guess which one is better and involves less collateral damage. I'll also let you decide which one most people go for haha! ___ Oh, and for those who are geographically appropriate: http://www.whataburger.com/whataburger_serves/12_days_of_whataburger/ Free food is awesome. « 5 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Monday, November 30th, 2009 «|»
12:09 pm «|»	One Week Later: On the other side of the wall. Everything has changed. Nothing has changed. I'll strain my memory, just for you, my little dumplings. Most of the first weekend was art. Painting mostly, but there was also some sewing and crafting. Got a DVD copy of the zombie movie I was in recently. :D :D :D Sunday, I went to see AFI. I decided to give my extra ticket to my friend Andrew (he's the guy who wrote & directed the above mentioned zombie movie, as well as the 'monster in the closet' bumper I posted a while back). He's a good guy, and he likes AFI, so that worked out well. ___ When I decided to give him the ticket, a plan started formulating in my mind for the next day. The next day, Monday was the Emilie Autumn show. I still had no luck with my extra ticket. I might as well be a 5 eyed mutant around here I guess. After taxes and fees, that VIP ticket cost over $70.00. Now granted, it does come with a hardbound book (which comes later, via mail). I think it's a great price for what all you get, and I would gladly pay it again, any time. But again, that even with such delicious 'bait' I still couldn't get anyone to go with me. Sooooo...... I decided "Fuck them if they don't know what's good" and I accepted my vague plan as a course of action. My room mate also had her own ticket, so at least I didn't have to drive down there and wait around all alone, that would have been even more creepy. We went early. Had to be there 'before 7:45pm' for the VIP event, but I wanted to be there even earlier for my awesome plan. We got there like WAY early. Walked around a bit, looking for other people whom it looked might be there for the show. My plan was, to find a complete stranger, who was unable to get a VIP ticket (they only sold 25 of them) and just bring them in to the event on my extra ticket. Was hoping to find someone who seemed cool, but wasn't (too terribly) creepy. We only saw one girl walking around who looked like she was there for the same thing. She had a cool dress. That's how we knew she was there for the show :D Well, I didn't approach her. I discouvered that as bold as I was in my mind when planning this out, I was still ME and thus 'stupidly shy' when it came down to 'the moment'. It was really early anyhow, so we decided to sit in the car and wait for a bit, since we got parking right near the venue (amazing how great parking is if you get there way early :P As we were sitting in the car, I said that I should have asked that Girl With The Good Dress if she had a VIP ticket, but it was so early, and I felt like a creep. We made fun of me a bit for being a big wiener. Then we saw the Girl With The Good Dress walking down the street towards us. I said I should ask her now, like out the car window, cause THAT would be even creepier! My room mate said that I should wait, because it would be too creepy and the police would come and punch my head. I agreed with this logic. After about 10 or 15 more minutes, we went back up near the venue and waited more. A few people sort of gathered around here and there, but no one who looked really approachable, or that I had a specific feeling about one way or another. I tend to go with instinct and gut feelings on this sort of thing. After a bit, we saw Girl With The Good Dress coming back, and I decided that maybe I would see if she had a VIP ticket. I stood there trying to convince myself that I was bold enough to do it, and that I wouldn't seem like some weird molester. As I stood there working on the 'talk to a random stranger' equation, Girl With The Good Dress walked right up to us and announced that she would hang out with us, because she saw us before, and standing with others made it easier to avoid being harassed by bums downtown (very true). She was very friendly and nice. Her name was Haemy. We talked for a few minutes, and I asked if she had a VIP ticket, and she did. So, that plan was out, but we had a new friend for the show, which was awesome. I got to looking around fairly intently now because there was about 20 minutes before we needed to be assembled for the VIP event. Most of the people were hanging around in groups. I didn't put them really high on the list, because if two or three people were together and had regular tickets, I didn't want any drama at inviting one (and only one) of them to the VIP. I was also discounting anyone who didn't clearly look over 18, because I didn't wan't to end up somehow being 'responsible' for anything stupid. At this point I noticed a guy standing all alone, but all the way across the street, sort of lurking in the shadows. He had glasses, was wearing a suit and tie, skeleton gloves and clutching a violin case as though it would stop him from drowning. I figured he was there for the show, but something seemed.... weird. It triggered a memory about a guy who had posted in the forums about the Austin show. He had asked if it would be possible to get his violin signed if he brought it, and asked about the venue. I had replied to the post, giving some info about parking in the area, and saying that in all likelyhood, that the only signing would be at the VIP event. I remembered the whole thing, because he had replied to my reply saying that he would be taking the bus, so parking didn't matter. Even his forum posts had seemed a little weird somehow. After another 10 minutes or so, I still didn't see anyone I felt like asking, and Violin Guy had made it across the street by now. He was sort of hiding on the other side of a street light from everyone else. I figured "Hell, this is the only guy here even more awkward than me, so why not?" I went over and said hello. He looked sort of terrified. I asked him if he rode the bus to the venue. He looked alarmed and suspicious. I then realized why he seemed so odd, both on the forums, and in person. He clearly didn't speak a whole lot of English. So I did the American Trick of Talking Loud And Slow (ala Gordon Cole <3). I said that I had seen his post on the forums, and that I was the one who had replied to him. He relaxed a lot and said he remembered. I asked him where he had come in from. Get this, guys... He rode the bus in all the way from MEXICO. He came all alone. A 5 hour bus ride into a foreign country, and took a cab from the bus station to the venue. He did not even have a ticket. Not even a regular one! He was just hoping that he would be able to buy one at the gate. Can you imagine the stones that took? Five hours on the bus, all alone, in another country, barely speaking the language, on a CHANCE to get in and see the show? His name was Manuel. I knew than, that fate was at hand, and that everything DOES happen for a reason, and that Today was the Luckiest Day of Manuel's young life. I said "OK, you're coming with me. We're going into the VIP, and you get to meet Emilie." He was excited, but he wasn't sure if he should believe me or not. Who can blame him? I would be suspicious too. But damn, if I wasn't excited to have found him. He was completely perfect for it. So, moving the story along. We went in, our whole new group of friends, me, Masani (my room mate), Haemy & Manuel. He finally believed it when we got inside haha :D Emilie came out, I went up to talk to her first out of our group & I made sure Manuel was next in line behind me. She remembered me from the Dallas show, which of course sent my heart aflutter. Said she still loves my hair, and poked around in it some, which I sure didn't mind. I leaned in close and told her the story of Manuel, and how he came to be here & let her know that he was very excited & didn't speak great English. She was really glad that I found him and got him in. All glowy smiles and happy. :D :D When Manuel went up, she gave him a little extra time and signed his violin for him. He was all nervous and shaking. It was adorable. The line went through a second time for pictures. Emilie got to play with my hair more, and said we could hold our picture pose all night. I said I sure wouldn't mind & she said she wouldn't either. Rawr! Manuel didn't have a camera, so we made sure to get pictures for him so he could get them via email. After the rest of the VIP event, which went on for nearly an hour, they processed our tickets. There was some confusion over Manuel's ID card. I guess the door guys had never seen one and couldn't verify it to their satisfaction, so they stamped him under 21 (he is 23, FYI) just to be safe. Which is no problem, because he wasn't planning to drink anyhow. However, the venue has no re-entry for minors, so he couldn't leave and come back at all. So, Masani stayed in with Manuel, and Haemy & I went to our respective cars together to drop off our swag and merch. Then we ran over to Casino el Camino and got food. Haemy ordered a giant cheeseburger for Manuel, and we took it back to him. Man, he truly had an amazingly lucky run of it! We were concerned that he might get the idea that Americans are nice to people from other countries haha. I had gotten food for Masani because I wasn't sure if she was hungry, and I believe in 'better safe than hungry'. She wasn't hungry. We had an extra giant cheeseburger, but a couple of Haemy's friends showed up and split it, so people gor fed all over! We ate our food like starving wolves, and the show started just after the last bite. As expected, not nearly enough people showed up for my liking, but I think everyone had a great time. The stage was too small for all the sets and props, but they had a modified version going on & it was still awesome. Made for a small & intimate show. We waited around for a bit after, because I was reeeeeally hopping that Maggots would come out, but the venue was being cranky about loitering & we took off. Manuel left first because he wanted to get a cab and head to the bus place. What a trooper. I totally admire his sense of adventure. We walked Haemy to her car (Bum Defense Force!) and then headed home. It was an awesome night, and one that I don't think any of us will ever forget. ___ After that, my week was mostly art art art. I got a lot of things done, and of course the more I do the more ideas I get and it's all a big whirling swirl, and somewhere in there, there was dinner at my moms house with friends & family. Many late nights. Small defeats far outweighed by small triumphs & joys. You make your own life & reality. If you decide to make it Revisionist Misery and blame everyone else for your own issues, then it's what you deserve. I choose more than that. I choose to make my world beautiful and grand, even if no one but me ever gets to experience it. And last but not least: I'm back :) Maybe you noticed :P « 20 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Sunday, November 22nd, 2009 «|»
11:38 pm «|»	This is me today. http://twitpic.com/qiu6n « 13 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Friday, November 20th, 2009 «|»
6:01 pm «|»	hahahahaha! Reborn through a field of dread and loathing onto a hill of excitement! I can't wait to tell you guys about this, but I have to wait till AFTER. :D :D « 1 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Thursday, November 19th, 2009 «|»
2:59 pm «|»	four&twenty Somehow managed to corrupt my custom myspace code that I've had for so long. Everything went all wonky. I might have a backup of it at home, but IDK if I'll mess with it, because I'm feeling rather lowtech today. I found that if I delete all the code for my once-awesome top friends section, that it gets the remaining tables and cells back in alignment, so I did that. Have the stupid default BS now, and my only top friend is Nigel. Which of course it probably the way that The Universe is choosing to communicate something very unsurprising and profound to me. ___ This week is finally grinding itself to an end. It's been intermittently fast and slow. Great example of Relativity in action. I guess tomorrow is going to be it for my patience and iron grip on 'waiting for it'. Too close to inflicting last minute plans on people as it is already. I hate sliding down the slope like that though. ___ Off all week next week. Have a few things I'm going to try to accomplish. And of course have to schedule around AFI on Sunday, and Emilie Autumn on Monday, then Thanksgiving At Mom's House on Thursday. Called off one project I had been suddenly excited about. Started feeling kinda stupid over it, and that turned into a deep and echoing apathy about the whole thing. I guess it's OK though, because I have plenty of other crap to work on, and I can always come back to it eventually. ___ Speaking of Monday... I simply can not encourage you all enough to check out ANY of the Emilie Autumn shows as the wanders the country. I saw her last month, and I wish I could catch more than just these two dates on the tour. She puts on the most amazing live show, maybe EVER. Not your 'typical concert for sure. No opening acts to suffer through. It's like a cross between a stage play, a vaudeville act, a burlesque show and a rock concert all at once. It goes on for a long time and has a whole lot of cool things to see. Probably more visual and entertainment production value than any other performers / band I've seen. I've seen a lot too, I ain't no punk bitch :P I would entreat local people to come down to Emo's on the 23rd and check it out, but that would be similar to slamming my hand in a door over and over. If you're going, then you already are, if you're not, then there's nothing I can say to sway you, because Austin sucks that way. Everyone has a place, and a comfort zone, and an acceptable list of places they will and won't go and there's not much deviation from it all unfortunately. Sure, it's a diverse city, but that's because we have a lot of different sorts of people, each firmly in their box with a square around it to be sure it doesn't touch any other boxes, and OH GOD! FLOWERS ARE RED, YOUNG MAN! There doesn't seem to be much intermingling going on honestly. Not between different groups of people, and not within any groups (and sadly, not even within any individuals either). But my whole Love/Hate thing with Austin (love that there's a lot of different things around, hate that it's all so cut & dry about what fits where) isn't the point here. The point is that Emilie Autumn is just about one of the coolest artists around today. So for people who might live somewhere else, and be less set in their ways: Go see her! ___ I think this is one of those days where regular old ideas are as like to turn into rants as not, so it might be better for both of us if I just go away now. <333 « 4 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Wednesday, November 18th, 2009 «|»
2:37 pm «|»	/firebomb Good job Humanity. As if THAT didn't make me hate it all just a little bit more. « 1 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
8:57 am «|»	Writer's Block: Gifted Ideas What’s the perfect gift to give to the person who has everything? Sponsored by Best Buy. Find holiday gifts for everyone on your list. View 534 Answers This is a trick question, but I have the proper answer. The perfect gift for them is a robbery. If they have everything, then they are in danger of forgetting how to live. They need to be saved from that and reminded of how fragile all that crap really is, and how at any moment those balances can be shifted. Go in, take their crap. If they're gone for a while (vacation, world tour etc) then take their crap and LIVE IN THEIR HOUSE while they're gone. Take the crap slowly and reverently. Give it away to homeless people. Spent an entire day driving around in their car, loaded with their junk, passing it out to any and everyone you see who might need something. Sell whatever you can and use the money to buy paint and re-paint their bedroom in a completely sickening colour. If you don't think that all of this will do the job properly (hey, some people are thick and need more) then use some of the change to buy ski-masks and wait for them to come home. When they come in, jump them and rough them up a little. Take whatever they have with them when they return. You wouldn't wanna leave them with all the extra crap they picked up in Bali. That needs to go too. They might even have left over travelers cheques. You probably won't be able to spend these, but on your way out, you can smash their car window, and toss them in before you start the upholstery fire. « 2 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Tuesday, November 17th, 2009 «|»
11:46 am «|»	bee salad This guy has a hilarious photo project going, check him out: http://www.flickr.com/photos/st3f4n/sets/72157616350171741/ and he's a One Piece fan :D And today, you're getting this: "Oh man, Look what the cat drug in It's got the dress, though the color's gone That I gave my one true love on and oh man, look what the wind blew home Never had this much stimulation 'Till her low down elevation, but oh, don't look in those eyes Bluer than blue rule's on the rise And if I wear apathy's crown Don't call me highness It's a long way down Oh, what terrible things she shows I'm overwhelmed by rumors this high And overcome by lows Oh, what use is it to pretend That I have the strength for this anymore This is all in the world that she lives for but... Oh, don't look in those eyes Bluer than blue Her rule's on the rise And if I wear apathy's crown Don't call me highness 'cause it's a long way down I would suppose That I'm not the only one One never knows... I got a feeling she's been Sleeping with the whole wide world" That's it for right now I guess. Less than a week left on both fronts, and I still got absolutely nothing. How sad is that? Knowing your place in the world and accepting / enjoying it are two different things. «|» mood: regal «|» « Fall From Grace » «|»
«|» Monday, November 16th, 2009 «|»
12:40 pm «|»	Oh, and also: My mom has gone off and gotten a LJ. Since I haven't said too many terrible things about her on here, I went ahead and added her as a friend. She's sure to say embarrassing things about me eventually, if she hasn't already. Anyhow, faedorah is her LJ name. I guess I had better behave. :P «|» mood: completely innocent «|» « 2 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»
12:36 pm «|»	as boring as it gets Got relocated within the building at work. I guess since so many people are going to be leaving due to that recent huge layoff, they're wanting to get everyone in this huge building condensed down into one general area. I have a feeling that the majority of the building will be empty and barren when it's all done. I do not like my new area as much as my old one. The desk and general accommodations are pretty much the exact same, I just don't like this room as much (it's larger and brighter) and I don't like the way in which I am oriented within the room (facing a wall rather than the larger area of the room). I guess there's not a lot to be done about it, and I'm not even complaining about it at all, just observing. I think I'm going to have to get some sort of 'rear-view mirror' though because for whatever reason when someone comes over to ask me something instead of saying "Hello" or "Excuse me" like a normal, sane person, they (for whatever reason) creep up behind me and just sort of stand there silently lurking like some sort of freak, waiting to be acknowledged. That really totally drives me right up the damn wall. I could understand waiting silently if I'm actively on a business call, but one should still position themselves so that they are visible and obviously waiting, rather than creep up and hide like they're on some sort of ninja mission. Contrary to how amazingly awesome I am in most every conceivable way, I actually can not see the area directly behind me while I am looking towards the front. I know that might be terribly hard to believe, and I hope that it does not shatter the faith that you all have in me, but it's true. Not only do I sometimes have sensitive client information up on my screen, but sometimes, like now, I be gettin my blog on, yanno? WTF freaks?! Fucking cut that shit out! Maybe I should make it a point to notice them somehow when they do it and then rather than acknowledge them, I should open Word with a 50 point font and start typing about killing and chopping off heads and burning people alive. Or maybe I should just suddenly and violently wheel my chair backwards with great velocity and smash them and then be shocked alarmed and upset that they were just hanging out behind me. Shame I can't make like the most wretched horrible gagging farts on command. It sucks not having super powers :/ Ugh. Annoying. Aside from that umm... Nothing much new I guess. Taking my sweet time working on the things I am working on because it's not like I have anyone to impress or answer to. Just me and my boring self. I am, however, starting to wonder if there is some sort of conspiracy, or perhaps a curse afoot in my life. Which is totally bizarre because usually I am immune to curses. « 3 Rapidly Plummeting «|» Fall From Grace » «|»